Recently, my son remarked that I tended to look back when he asked me “Dad, why do you tend to look back?” “How so?” I asked him back? It transpired that he was alluding to my tendency to share something that I have had experienced, seen or heard which, to me, had a relevancy to the current context that may have cropped into our conversation in the first place. Or it could be a long answer in respond to a question he was asking. In other words, instead of giving a direct answer, I would tell a story or share an experience that’s relevant to the question in the first place. Such an approach is like mentoring and downloading of experience and insight.
At first, I was taken aback by the question since I have had assumed that the answer is quite obvious. I had assumed, maybe too presumptuously, that everyone tends to do the same— the mind reviewing the whole spectrum of time, up and down in linear fashion, from time to time. Or for some, even, in and out, of the normal dimensions for those gifted with the ability to perceive through many dimensions, not just the linear timeline.
His question made me wonder, whether I was the only one who likes to reflect back on the past as a means to understand the present, and even the future, for that matter. I guess many do so, the only difference is how far back they are willing to travel, or how many different dimensions they are willing to “slice and dice” as they contemplate upon these scenarios.
I didn’t give him an immediate answer. His question kind of caught be off guard, and I needed to reflect on it. Eventually, a remarked: “Oh, from time to time, I’d like to reflect upon what happened in the past, whether it’s about my own experiences or my observations of things, of other people, or of events and happenings. I am trying to decipher the lessons learnt or to get an insight from the moment or episode in question and see it would help me in the present!”
Frankly, it was just a top of the head respond, more to buy time for me to reflect even deeper on the question, and was not quite a serious attempt to respond to what I think was a really serious and fundamental question. My son had asked a Socratic question.
In harking to the past, we are in fact digging into our experiences to speak to the present— whether to help solve a problem or provide some new insight to us. Our past experience are an excellent guide and faithful teacher, speaking to us in the present moment. That is, if only we’d be willing to listen, and have that servanthood mindset with the humility to learn and re-learn. The term ‘servanthood mindset’ came from my cousin Mary, herself a deep thinker with a sincere heart.
As we grow on in age, we become more and more conscious that whilst our mind, aspirations and dreams are still young, our body is aging by the day. Maybe, this heightened awareness is brought on by our increased sensitivity to the fact of our physical aging along the march of time. That heightened awareness triggers such an indepth alertness of a mind that is still not yet old and remains sharp as when we were still kids filled with curiosity and wonderment at the world we were growing up in. It reminded me of the following passage:
“The tragedy of old age is not that one is old, but that one is young. Inside this aging body is a heart still as curious, still as hungry, still as full of longing as it was in youth. I sit at the window and watch the world pass by, feeling like a stranger in a strange land, unable to relate to the world outside, and yet within me, there burns the same fire that once thought it could conquer the world. And the real tragedy is that the world still remains, so distant and elusive, a place I could never quite grasp.”
— Albert Camus, “The Fall”
So remembering the past is natural reaction at the subconscious level that is fired by a heart and spirit which never grows old. Recalling the past experiences is crucial for personal growth and understanding, acting as a foundation for our present and future choices. Our minds needs the stimulation which serves to fuel and energise it. On a practical level, by reflecting on past experiences, we learn from mistakes, build resilience, and gain valuable insights into ourselves and the world around us.
I did some further search on the subject and came across the following explanation on the importance of looking back:
• Learning from Mistakes: Past experiences, both positive and negative, offer invaluable lessons. By analyzing what went right and wrong, we can refine our decision-making processes and avoid repeating errors.
• Building Resilience: Navigating challenges and setbacks in the past strengthens our ability to cope with adversity in the future. Remembering past struggles and triumphs equips us with the tools to overcome obstacles and persevere.
• Understanding Ourselves: Our past shapes our identities, values, and beliefs. Reflecting on significant events and relationships helps us understand who we are and what is important to us.
• Connecting with Others: Shared memories and experiences create bonds and foster deeper connections. Remembering past events with loved ones strengthens relationships and creates a sense of belonging.
• Gaining Perspective: Looking back allows us to see patterns and connections that might otherwise be missed. This perspective helps us make more informed decisions and navigate the complexities of life.
• Appreciating the Present: Remembering the past allows us to appreciate the present and all that we have. It helps us to avoid taking things for granted and to live more fully in the moment.So the next time you see or hear someone making references to the past, try to understand the context and dynamics of how the mind and the soul operate in. Better still, do your own self reflection so that you will get a better and deeper insight into the present, into what really matters and most importantly, getting a better understanding of your own self. All the great teachers and thinkers of the past were great contemplators, meditators and reflectors. They learn from what happened in the past. They prepare themselves in this manner for the future that in unfolding for them.
